December 15th – “Your ability to listen is far sexier than others’ long monologues.”

Monologues are great if you’re the most interesting person in the room OR acting in a play. How often does that happen?

I’m definitely no Dottore (a person who talks incessantly and LOVES to hear the sound of his/her own voice) but I feel like I talk more than I listen. Is that really true?

According to a quick non-scholarly search, there are 10 (or 4 if you group them together) types of listening:

Types of Listening

Discriminative – identifying sounds to distinguish words

Comprehensive – listening to the content of the message

Critical/Evaluative – evaluating and judging a message

Biased – hearing what one wants to hear, interpreting messages to fit one’s own biases

Appreciative – listening for enjoyment

Sympathetic – showing concern for others

Empathetic –  understanding others (by putting yourself in their shoes)

Therapeutic – listening to support others

Dialogic – learning through the exchange of ideas

Relationship – listening to sustain a relationship and developing trust


Click here for original article

For more comprehensive reading, check out these articles:


There are many moments where I do listen attentively. I’ve can listen for hours on end when appreciative listening is mixed with critical and dialogic listening. This happens when I’m attending a talk or lecture. The one that I can really work on it relationship listening.

Tonight, I’m staying with my sister. She’s a lot quieter than I am, so I often perform monologues when I’m around her. It’s amazing, probably to the point of ridiculousness, of how much I have to say in one breath! The last time I was there, I might have talked for 30 minutes straight. Perhaps I can learn to break this pattern of behavior by being the listener.

I know I won’t be able to cure my bad habit in one night, but it’s a good start. Wish me luck!


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